child abuse affects

[E]

Hello, My name is Emilia

I want to share my story, just for the reason that it might help someone out there or help someone to spot the signs on time..
I have survived abuse. The person that abused me was my own biological father. He had and still has a huge drinking problem. When he was sober he was okay, he was just like any other dad or so I thought, how would I have known that he isn´t. He started to abuse me when I was about 1 year old when his drinking problem took a turn for the worst, he had lost his job and stayed home with us, my mother tried to support our family alone, she had a job as a cleaner in a old-folks home and she studied to be a nurse at the same time. The first things I remember was when I discovered the stereos in our living room and I remember thinking that the knob on the stereos looks funny (it was the volume knob) I went and turned it, nothing happened because the stereos were turned off so I forgot about it and continued playing on the living room floor, my dad came in cause he had just woken up from a nap and turned on the stereos and the volume that came out was massive, of course cause I had turned the knob to max.. I started laughing because I understood what the knob was for, my dad became angry as hell started screaming and cursing and I was scared so I ran away but he caught me, he took me by my long blonde hair and dragged me down the hall and slammed me head first into a wall... blood came out and I started to scream and cry as loud as I could.. I can´t remember what happened after that, the only thing I know is that my brother had a cast on his arm and I had severe bruising on my face and head a few days after the incident.. my brother has refused to talk about that day... that´s just one of the things that have happened... I remember running in the snow on our street in my panties in a cold weather and screaming for help "" my daddy is killing my mommy, please help!!"" but nobody came, people just stared out of their windows and when the cops got to our home my dad had already fled... My mother gathered the courage to get a divorce, change the locks into our house and get a restraining order against my dad.. the nights of horror didn´t stop there..my mother became extremely depressed and started to drink, she abused us mentally.. she didn´t mean to but she didn´t know how to cope.. I became the mother in a way.. I started looking after her, she continued to work and lead a "normal" life.. her mind is distrubed forever..

My brother refuses to talk about what happened.. and the other one has dealt with it and gotten over it as well as he can and so have I.. I just want to say that think about it long and hard before you decide not to get involved if you see a child being abused!! im one of the lucky ones that have survived but think about the ones that don´t , the life that they have been robbed off and think about the scars that the ones that do make it carry around for the rest of their lives.. it is something that one can never forget or forgive, you can learn to live with it but the pain dosen´t stop, the question "why didn´t anyone help me" dosen´t fade away and I for one can say that I am almost too cautious about the caregivers in my child´s life. I could never ever hurt my child or let anyone do so

Please report any suspicion of child abuse!! you can save someones life!!

[admin]

Thank you for sharing your story, Emilia. It was very moving and I'm sure it took a lot of courage to share it. I hope by reading your story, others will feel moved and encouraged to take a stand against child abuse. If they don't feel the desire to get involed, hopefully they will at least feel a greater obligation to report abuse rather than turn a blind eye.
Also, please feel welcomed to join by following this link: ucp.php?mode=register
We would love to have you!

[Emilia]

Thank you very much for welcoming me. I truly hope that my story would open even one persons eyes to see what is going on around them.. No child sould ever suffer.

[yhiannah]

Welcome, Emilia--we are very glad to have you. Thank you for sharing your story. I know it took a lot of courage to write every word. I applaud you for using your painful past to help others see the reality of child abuse and the effects it carries into adult life as well. Blessings to you, and again, Welcome to Broken Child!